Active Things to Do With Friends Who Don’t Tri

If you’re feeling down because you forgo social activity because it doesn’t mesh with your training—and your friends and family are feeling neglected—consider these activities that will keep you in tip top tri shape AND satisfy everyone’s need to be around your awesomeness:

1. Go for a long hike. After a hilly long hike, your butt and thighs will hurt more than any long hilly run you’ve ever done.

2. “Play” in the ocean (if you have one). You can then practice your ins and outs under the guise of “bodysurfing”, and challenge your friends to swim out to something and back (thereby getting in your yardage…but keeping up the appearance that you are just “playing”.)

3. Have a pushup or crunch contest.

4. Go out for Italian food. They’ll enjoy it and never know you have the ulterior motive of carbo-loading.

5. Go shopping. Watching your girlfriends (or the new upcrop of metrosexual dudes) drop tons of cash on clothes will make you feel less guilty about spending all of yours on spandex. I have yet to find a skinsuit that costs as much as a pair of D&G jeans.

Enjoy Your Friends! (And whip them into shape in the process!)

Happy Friday!

The Pros and Cons of Riding Your Bike to Work

You are a triathlete. You love riding your bike. So why not get in some extra mileage and work on making your legs even sexier by riding to work? Here are some considerations to make when thinking about ditching the car for the Kuota.

Pros

1. If you live in a big city, it may very well take you less time to ride than it does to drive.

2. By riding your bike, you are doing your part to save our environment, so you can feel good about yourself for that contribution all day.

3. Effortless extra mileage can be added to your training plan.

4. No more listening to Ryan Seacrest’s psychobabble in the morning.

5. You can eat even more than you already do to make up for your work-ride caloric expenditure.

Cons

1. If you have an impressionable forehead, like TriDiva, you may be left with unsightly helmet marks that make you look like you’re a character from Star Trek that will last all day long and through every meeting you have. (Or, you might just get stuck with helmet hair.)

2. If your office has no gym nearby / shower facilities, you may stink big time upon your arrival. (However, this may also be a good thing if you do not enjoy contact with your co-workers anyway.)

3. Drivers are a**holes, a lot of the time. You may arrive at work frazzled, and with a sore middle finger you can no longer lift to secretly use vs. your boss or anyone else at work. (But you shouldn’t be flicking people off anyway…because they might try to kill you…especially people in Camry’s…there’s something about people in Camry’s and cyclist stalkers…)

4. You no longer get to listen to Ryan Seacrest’s morning psychobabble—and you actually enjoyed it!

5. If you’re the forgetful type, you may arrive at work having found you’ve forgotten work essentials—like underwear, a shirt that isn’t made out of spandex, or shoes that don’t have cleats attached. If you’re forgetful and still want to ride to work, make a checklist and get everything ready the night before.

Happy Commuting!

Bike Crash Photo du Jour

At least it wasn't rocky...

Happy Summer Training!

Injury + Stress + Hormones = TriathleteDemon

If you are currently experiencing any of the following, please cease all social contact immediately, as you are probably unintentionally being an ass.

1. Stress at work

2. Confusion about your calling in life

3. Flat feet

4. Uteran wrath

5. Loss of a loved one

6. Split ends

7. Crappy gas mileage

8. Ingrown toenails

9. Enlarged chocolate intake

10. Sweat-induced acne

When you have calmed down enough and taken some sort of action to make yourself presentable, it would probably be beneficial to talk to someone. Until then, hiding somewhere with your chocolate stash may be the best option…or a long ride.

Happy Friday!

Exclusive! Squirrel Caught in Bike Spokes!

From a friend of a friend...and you thought that if you ever ran over a squirrel, it would just squish squirrel guts all over you...

Happy Suicide Animal Avoidance!