This can't have ended well either:
Happy Off-Road Training!
When injury strikes, we stubborn triathletes tend to ignore the pain--or we freak out about it. No matter which end of the spectrum you're on, these mantras should help you jump on a sane road to recovery:
1. I will allow my body to heal.
2. I will not overtrain another sport to make up for time not running/swimming/biking.
3. I will not freak out that I will become fat in my new state of lower volume training.
4. I will religiously put frozen peas on my injury, and take Advil.
5. I shall not whine to my friends about my injury, lest they ban me from future training sessions with them. Or from all social activity.
Chill! The worst thing you could possibly do is to train through your injury. Doing this will never let it fully heal, and you'll only to have to take loads of time off later when it leads to something bigger and more evil.
Happy Injury-Free Training!
This could not have ended well:
I have nothing else to say. Ouch. Nice photography.
Happy training!
From the point of view of an Xterra newbie:
The most brutal swim
Known to mankind
Kicked in the chin
And in the eye
Muddy transition
But that’s just fine
The dirtier the better
And I’m toward the front of the line
Off on my borrowed steed
Forgot to grab my gu’s
After 2 hours
I begin to loose my juice
Holy crap! A girl flies by
With my age on her thigh
(OK calf, but that doesn’t rhyme)
Must stay with her or else
I’ll be left in the dirt by myself
Up! Up! Up! We go!
Man do we run slow
I’m starting to break away
I really want to win today
But there’s a chubby dude in my way
I do not gracefully go around him
And the sight of my ankle twisting astounds him
Must keep running!
I’m almost there!
Oh! I see the finish line!
And it looks most divine.
Water! Food! Must stuff my face
Xterra was an awesome race!
Happy racing!
10 Triathlon Truths to Live By
1. You do not have to race all of the time to be a triathlete.
2. Gu tastes better than PowerGel.
3. USAT rankings don’t mean anything. Just like when you were ranked in the top 10% of your high school class. Who has asked you about that in the last 10 years?
4. There is nothing sexier than salt-marked spandex.
5. It’s OK to spend hours cleaning your bikes, and then refer to the 1 inch thick dirt layer on your car as it’s “chocolate icing”.
6. It’s normal to find the sex issue of a triathlon magazine to be more interesting than Cosmo ever has been.
7. If you’ve ever wondered how the race director for that last Olympic distance race spent your $125, you’re not alone. That’s a lot of Powerbars, and you didn’t eat a single one.
8. 8pm is a perfectly acceptable bed time.
9. 2,000 calories can be considered a “snack”.
10. Bugs swallowed on descents are good for you.
Happy being a Triathlete!
You've logged so many miles on the roads around your town, the next town over, and maybe even all over your entire state. The thought of doing one more "morning loop" makes you want to turn off the lights and set the alarm to "never". Before you throw in the towel and start eating massive amounts of chocolate because your slumpish state of mind has you feeling like you'll never be an athlete again, TRY SOMETHING NEW!
And I don't mean something new like doing your loop backward (although sometimes that helps).
Put away your aerobars, your skinny tires, and fear of small cracks in the road, steal a friend's mountain bike, and hit the trails! Not only will you still get a great workout in, you'll feel reinvigorated, and realize there's a whole different world of skills you need to work on. Isn't that fun!? And instead of avoiding every little crevice and bump in the road like the plague or getting yelled at to "hold your line", you can slam into everything in your path--you can even swerve off and create your own!
Nothing's stopping you now!
Any complete lack handling skill can be greatly masked by a nice full-suspension bike with disc brakes.
Just sayin'.
And if the freedom of the open fire road wasn't enough to get your blood flowin' again, consider this: chicks and cool dudes alike dig mountain biking scars. So if you're ready, forget the full suspension and disc brakes, bust out that bike your dad bought you when you were 13 because it was "pretty" and get flying down those hills! Sign up for an Xterra event while you're at it--it'll make you get better fast so you won't look like a weenie come race day.
And possibly, you will soon look as cool as this dude:
Happy alternative training!
Triathlon has you out and about every day. Out in the sun, enjoying all the beautiful scenery nature has to offer. Because of this, your coworkers are envious of your permanently sun-kissed skin--your year-round healthy glow. But all of that sun-exposure, while making you look cool and athletic (and setting you up for wrinkles later on...but you look good now!) puts you at a higher risk of skin cancer than your buddies who don't spend their Saturdays on 7 hour bike rides.
The most common places to get skin cancer are on your face, neck, and ears. And your forearms and the backs of your hands. No problem, you say, I wear a helmet that covers my face, a visor when I run, and gloves when I bike.
But there's one little place that frequently gets missed while you're paying all of that attention to your pretty face and hands. Your lower back. And after hours of biking in the sun, the space between your jersey and your shorts can cause a rather funny looking tan that TriDiva likes to call the "Smiley Face", because it looks like you've got a big red grin on your back. (And if you really get into it, you can pretend your shoulder blades are the eyes.)
So this is just a little reminder to pay attention to this big chunk of skin that so often gets overlooked. When you're sunscreening up for the day--or reapplying--DON'T forget to show your lower back some love. Or else you could wind up with a vindictive smiley face with cancer between his teeth.
Happy Training!
In a Google image search for "funny triathlon", this showed up on the first page. No joke.
Which sign do you think was posted first?
Maybe the thought of getting hunted down for running a 10+ minute mile would make a kid run faster...
Happy Training!
Most people think of moving as a stressful, difficult, pain in the you know what time. That it distracts from training, and that the necessary security deposits, etc…have stolen the newest carbon fiber component they’d been saving up for right out from under them.
OK, so that last part is true. Security deposits are the devil. But here are 3 reasons why moving might just be the next best thing (after caffeine and a coachance/hoach/woach/boach/goach) for your training:
1. New routes! That’s right, if you were ever feeling like you were in a rut from doing the same 7 mile loop every Thursday morning, or the same ride out your door every Wednesday, now’s your chance to explore and invent a new route…because you have to! Woo hoo!
2. Out with the old. In the process of moving, you will find all kinds of things you didn’t even know you had. Instead of trying to hang on to them in a blast of newfound sentimentality (hey, you didn’t know you had them anyway, remember?), sell your stuff on eBay or on Craigslist! Heck, you can even make it a game to try to earn back that entire monster of a security deposit!
3. Cool workout stuff! Yep. Also in the process of digging through the mystery that is your closet, you might come across something amazing. Like that super-cool ‘80s Jane Fonda-like unitard. Something like that should instantly inspire you to hit the gym and strut your stuff. Because nothing is more motivating than new (or newfound) spandex to get you up and out the door!
Happy Moving!
Wildflower was awesome this year. But one thing (that happens to be one of my favorite foods) was missing. Jamba Juice! Oh where, oh where did they go? I so relish taking my coupon for a free smoothie to my local Jamba Juice the day after the race because it's like a 2 for one: I get to underhandedly brag simply by presenting it AND I get a free smoothie. Life doesn't get much better than that.
In it's place? An old Triathlete magazine...that we all probably got already in the mail.
NOTE: This loss of fruity deliciousness as a sponsor in no way effected the overall fabulousness of the race. It's only effect was on post-race celebration, bragging rights, and re-fueling.
Wildflower is FUN! But here are a few things you'll need so you don't end up on some stranger's RV doorstep begging to use their kitchen:
1. FOOD! There's no Olive Garden in sight, so make your own stuff and bring it, or cook at the campsite
2. Warm clothes--gloves, hat, thick socks. It gets chilly at night!
3. Verizon wireless service. It's no secret that Cingular sucks a lot in certain places. Wildflower is one of those places. Best be making friends with someone who has Verizon, or you'll never meet your friends...unless they have Cingular, too.
4. A sense of adventure! There are people everywhere. Forget that cushy hotel bed you slept in before all of your other races. This is an experience, not a luxury vacation.
5. Patience. Especially if you're a girl doing the Olympic distance race. You won't be leaving until at least 1 hour and 10 minutes after the first wave of the race. So chill! Use the bathroom for the umpteenth time and strut around in your sexy wetsuit.
Good luck!
Happy Wildflower racing!
It's good for the mind, heart, and soul. You can clear your thoughts. And should the weather be particularly extreme, you'll feel like a champ for braving it. Running on the treadmill just plain sucks. And this guy would agree:
Check out this goofy treadmill video, and put a smile on your face!
Happy training! (OUTSIDE!!!)
You planned your whole life around the event--maybe even for an entire year. Then it's all over in a single day. It's easy to feel lost and uncertain after the post-IM endorphins run their course. What's your purpose now? What are you doing? WHAT DO YOU DO WITH ALL THIS FREE TIME!?
Here are some suggestions, in absolutely no order of importance:
You can beat the post-Ironman blues. Remember, it's a common affliction, and although TriDiva is not familiar with any PIB support groups, your triathlon buddies and family are here to help you through it, just like they were there for you all through your training. And all through race day...maybe you should bake them a chocolate cake...
Happy Recovery!