Tuesday, February 13, 2007

The Triathlete vs. The Dog

Typically, people who own large dogs are active people. Because those dogs have to go to the toilet a lot, and their owners would rather not have it happen in their homes. And because they have enough stamina to complete a significant run with you. And because they love you unconditionally, etc...

But what if someone else's dog decides to go on a run with you? Like a big playful lab who is so excited to meet you, he can't contain himself or run in a straight line? If he's outside, his owner must not be far away, right?

Lab Running

You could check his tags to see if he might have run far away, but who has time for that in the middle of an interval? "Cute dog," you think, "but I wish it would go away because it's messing up my workout!" Then...BAM! Cute dog does a 90 degree turn straight into you, swiping your feet out from under you and jumping happily as you eat asphalt in front of an unsuspecting school mom in a minivan who visibly freaks out, but doesn't stop her car.


Now your hip hurts, your knee hurts, you have worse road rash than your friend who legitimately got it from crashing his bike last weekend in the rain, blood running down your shin, and the dog has magically disappeared.


What to do? Well, if you checked his tags and have a photographic memory, you could go to his owner and shove your beautifully bloodied leg in his/her face and tell her her lovely Foofie did that and she/he should keep him on a leash.

Or you could see if you can find the dog, then swipe his legs out from under him and see how he likes it. Only in this situation, it's almost certain that any school mom in a minivan watching you would probably get out of her car and make a death threat against you for committing crimes against precious animals. (Yes, it's twisted. But drivers don't care about people who exercise, remember? Dogs who exercise, on the other hand, are safe.)

Angry Athlete

Or you could continue on with your run, hoping the pain will go away, and thinking to yourself that next time, you'll tie the dog to a fire hydrant or something before you continue your interval, just for peace of mind.

What would you do?

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